I arrived in the world’s biggest city, New York last week. A lot has happened since thing.
First, I was in my electric rascal scooter at the airport when I thought I saw a sidewinder snake on the carpet. I was so scared out of my wits and looking down and didn’t see that I was about to crash into a greasy little man giving out idiotic magazines about Satan and how he’d rip you in half with beavers or whatever the words really were and about Jesus, and I cursed him.
I yelled this, so I made all the words using the biggest letters I could find: “HEY YOU FILTHY LITTLE VOLUNTEER! I COULD HAVE KILLED YOU OR YOU COULD HAVE BEEN BIT BY THAT VIPER!”. He said to me: “I’m sorry mam.” I don’t know how you spell mam, but it’s like man with an m on the end.
Then he gave me $10.00 and said “get yourself a meal”. So I had some Cinnabon.
A lot of things happened after that, but I keep those secret.
Later, I arrived at the Waldorf Estonia where what happened was so horrible that I will need to write it tomorrow. So tired lately. And I hate this business center.