Back from Austria

So I keep getting messages from people saying “Otto, where are you” and “Otto, where did you go?”. First of all, I’m a big man, and when I move, people know about it, which is why I talked so much about going to Austria, so everyone would know and not get concerned. But I had a run in with the Cubans, and then there was some physical altercations, and I ended up in a hospital for pulling some ligaments in my forearms while employing my special martial arts tactic I developed in 1963 with my manservant Choi in Japan. Because of the rapid speed of my arms, they are obviously prone to injury if employed incorrectly, and when ten Cubans are hitting you with bamboo, you do the best you can.

When I hold still, everyone is all concerned like maybe I’ve passed into the realm where mortals cannot dwell, or maybe I’ve had another panic attack and fallen into a coma in the bathtub.

I’m not making myself clear. My medications are putting thoughts of muscle men and frog dancing in my head, and it’s better for everyone if I just let that clear out. The Austria trip was edifying, but I’ll get to that later.


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